Adult children of alcoholics

DEFINITION: According to a study published in JAMA Pediatrics in 2025, eleven million parents in the United States suffer from alcohol use disorder (AUD). Children brought up in homes with parents or guardians suffering from AUD or otherwise dysfunctional homes are often exposed to emotional, psychological, or physical abuse, and the scars left by these parents can last long into adulthood.

The Effects of Alcoholism on Families

Adult children of alcoholics (ACOA) suffer from a wide range of negative effects because of their disrupted family backgrounds, including a fourfold increase in the likelihood of suffering from AUD themselves, higher rates of mental disorders, higher rates of marrying into similar families, and higher rates of becoming separated or divorced from their spouses. Typical ACOA tendencies can affect critical elements of life, including interpersonal relationships, parenting style, career goals, and finances.

Trust and security, two necessities for successful long-term relationships, do not come easily for many ACOAs, who typically grew up in insecure or chaotic homes and may choose to isolate themselves from others. In addition, because many parents dealing with AUD were often more preoccupied with drinking than with caring for their children, ACOAs may have suffered from neglect during their childhoods and may have a strong need for affection, which can manifest itself as possessiveness, jealousy, and oversensitivity. The strong desire to be loved can lead ACOAs to inspire dependency in their own children. ACOAs’ need for approval can also lead them to overspend or pay beyond their means to please others. Also, many ACOAs had to mature early and assume the responsibilities that the alcoholic parent could not fulfill, which can create an overdeveloped sense of responsibility in ACOAs and contribute to feelings of inadequacy and loss of control.

Finding Help

The depth to which alcohol use disorder affects ACOAs’ daily lives depends on a wide range of variables, from their own personalities and coping skills to the extent to which their parent’s alcoholism affected their early developmental years. All ACOAs can benefit from learning strategies that will help them overcome negative behaviors and chart courses for healthy futures, but no single method works best for everyone. Options include:

Reading. Find the latest books and research, both in print and online, about alcohol abuse and the way it can affect family life.

Talking. Confide in a close friend or family member who can understand your feelings and respect your privacy without judgment.

Counseling. Meet with a psychologist or certified social worker who can help you focus on your future, not the pains of the past. Sometimes talking with a stranger can be more therapeutic than talking with a friend.

Joining. Become a part of a free support group that meets in person or in a private online chat forum to find out how other ACOAs have overcome barriers to happiness. Twelve-step programs, such as Al-Anon and Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA), or local support groups, can be particularly empowering.

Bibliography

Dayton, Tian. "Adult Children of Alcoholics and Trauma." The Huffington Post, 13 Feb. 2015, www.huffpost.com/entry/adult-children-of-alcohol_1_b_6676950. Accessed 14 Oct. 2025.

Ketcham, Katherine, et al. Beyond the Influence: Understanding and Defeating Alcoholism. Bantam, 2000.

Ludwig, Arnold. Understanding the Alcoholic’s Mind: The Nature of Craving and How to Control It. Oxford UP, 1989.

McCabe, Sean E., et al. "US Children Living With a Parent With Substance Use Disorder." JAMA Pediatrics, vol. 179, no. 7, 2025, pp. 797–99, doi:10.1001/jamapediatrics.2025.0828. Accessed 14 Oct. 2025.

Martin, Scott C. The SAGE Encyclopedia of Alcohol: Social, Cultural, and Historical Perspectives. Sage, 2015.

Miller, William R., and Kathleen M. Carroll, editors. Rethinking Substance Abuse: What the Science Shows, and What We Should Do about It. Guilford, 2010.

Mosel, Stacy. "Children of Alcoholics: The Impact of Alcoholics on Kids." American Addiction Centers, 18 June 2024, americanaddictioncenters.org/alcoholism-treatment/children. Accessed 14 Oct. 2025.
Rothenberg, William A., et al. "Modeling Trajectories of Adolescent-perceived Family Conflict: Effects of Marital Dissatisfaction and Parental Alcoholism." Journal of Research on Adolescence: The Official Journal of the Society for Research on Adolescence, vol. 27, no. 1, 2016, p. 105, doi:10.1111/jora.12259. Accessed 15 Oct. 2025.

Susman, David. "Characteristics of Adult Children of Alcoholics." Verywell Mind, 28 Apr. 2024, www.verywellmind.com/common-traits-of-adult-children-of-alcoholics-66557. Accessed 14 Oct. 2025.